Never really been visited by the black dog. Yes, I have been down and sad, but it’s been because of death or other bad news and surprisingly these have been short and mild periods compared to this.

I think the referendum in 2016 was more a shock to the system than depression. Even if I had a feeling that we would get the result we got. The build up to the 31st of March was more fear than depression, same goes with the 31st of October. The UK at the time was still in utter chaos like when the deadline in April passed, but there was a bit of hope that they UK would suddenly be “woke”.

Then the election rocked up and it looked like a Tory win with a side dish of hope of a hung parliament. This fecking scared and depressed me no end.

The racist loon won, well first we had the exit polls, which hit me hard. Some time and beers later it was clear it was not a bad dream but reality. Full moon and Friday the 13th, if that isn’t an omen and a half.

Within days if not hours we got confirmed what I and others have feared. The withdrawal agreement would be worse that what promised.

Oven ready my arse, the fecking menu changed.

Pay as you go health care, workers’ rights cuts along with food standards etc getting a hammering. Oh I forgot the border in the Irish sea …

A week later the MPs voted yes to this loons idea of a good deal. Totally ignoring that they would have no further say in the matter. Heck even some labour MPs voted for it and other abstained …

This fecking depressed me even more and truly sent me over the edge from just being a bit down and sad. To digging my face deep into the fur of the black dog.

So many people I meet and talk to in the shops or out walkies, are walking into this with their fingers in the ears going lalalalala. And still think this will be sunny uplands and this government have their best interest at heart. They might do if you have a few million squirrelled away in an offshore account.

If not, you (and we all) are truly fucked and that depresses me no end.

Not only that it is my life that got a massive change ahead, what I come to love in the last nearly quarter of a century, is no more. But also for the British friends I now have, their lives just hit a U-turn at high speed.

I dread to think how I’ll feel come February 1st 2020.

Slight side note : page 48 in the Tory manifesto says pretty much the same as Article 48 in the Weimar Constitution. E.G. the leader is above the law. This should scare you no end, history got a brilliant way of repeating itself.